12 sleeps

Ah done gone thunk myself awake at 2am then ah done gone thunk some more.

I find I am particularly adept at thinking things through between the hours of 3am and 5am. I recommend you try it sometime. Because, you know, everyone is awake at those hours anyway.

As everyone who reads this blog, FB status updates and tweets knows, and everyone who is in within moaning distance of me knows, I lost my TheNotTheBullet the other day. Now, on top of that, my char has made off with the main sections of my wardrobe (long story, don't ask, it pains me to think about). At this rate, I'm going to be going back to Canada with the clothes on my back and a handbag. So, naturally, being car-less, mostly clothes-less, almost job-less and nearly home-less, I am feeling the pangs of stress a bit. Hence the 2am wake up.

There I was, at 2am, cursing the curs-ed universe and all the hell it has been raining down upon me (I can be a real drama queen when I want to be) and then I had a little pause. Then, a slight suspension. Then a flash. Then silence. Then stillness. Then a stupefied look on my face.

Now, it may seem dramatic and self indulgent, but I am like this dude. I am figuratively throwing myself on the pyre (let's keep it figurative, universe!) to get ready for the next chapter. And, I also realized that I haven't been given a life defining moment by the universe because, through moments like this and the one in 1997, I give them to myself. And, accepting that as fact, I feel much calmer now.